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Weird Relationships (it’s not what you think it’s about)

Let’s talk about child abuse.

We’re gonna leave out sexual or verbal abuse.

Not even gonna touch physical abuse.

Let’s talk about my step-dad! Brent. Brent was a cock-rocker, and played his heart out in terrible bands with names such as, “Prism” (not to be confused with the actually famous band).

My biological father hated the fact that I was left-handed, and I get that it’s a weird/random thing to hate, but he hated a lot of things. He was second only to Hitler, and I don’t make this joke lightly. So, we’re gonna leave aside the fact that my dad told me I’d grow up to be “retarded” for being left-handed, and that he handcuffed my mom to sinks to beat her before I was born, were just gonna straight-up talk about the wonderful things about my later-on abuser, Brent. Let’s talk about the step-dad that my mom lied to CPS about in a nice light? Is it gonna get weird? Not really, but like all abusers, he has redeeming qualities:

Brent never minded that I was left-handed. I remember playing throw and catch in the front yard with him.

When I thought there were snakes (they were actually worms) under my basketball set-up, Brent inspiected.

I am 90% sure that the greatest picture ever taken of me resides in his wallet. (I was 6, heavy bangs, natural highlights, holding a mic.)

He said, “I love you” from time to time.

When he wasn’t stealing our VCR (actually did that once) he would try to provide for us.

I can’t wreck my brain enough in hopes for more nice things to say about this man that basically acted as my father from 2 up. I can say that I got to interact with guitars a lot more than most, but that doesn’t count for shit. I’m doing my best and my mom will be dead soon, and him too. I’m just trying to remember them in the nicest way possible. $10 says I won’t get asked to give the eulogy.